Christian hijab & head covering - how to explain it?!

Well boys and girls, today i have 'hijab on the brain'.. or rather around it *groan* bad joke..

I recently found a whole sleuth of mostly Christian hijabis and even niqabis on blogs! Here are some of them:

Heather @ Non-Muslim Niqabi
Amber @ Little Steps Home

Stacy @ Layla Land

Sanil @ Barei Lev

Wow it really is mind-blowing to think that there are so many! I think of my scarf more as head covering than hijab, partly to differentiate to my muslim friends although i’m sure they all refer to me as “muhajaba” (someone who wears hijab) between themselves.

While covering for the Christian faith has a whole new dimension and is immensely encouraging, I always cheer on the non-Christian hijab/head coverers as well, mostly because I think it takes guts. And I believe it is the height of feminism (although I don’t consider myself a feminist) to wear what you want just because you want to!! Isn’t that freedom ladies?! I really believe even if I didn’t have religious reasons for covering, I should be able to simply because I like it! It makes me happy!

I generally don’t wear a hijab style but sometimes (not when it’s hot!!) I just want to swathe myself in material! Especially soft soft pretty scarves! Sadly, more often than not I don’t, unless i’m chilling at a muslim girlfriends house or at home, in the Middle east or somewhere random.
Maybe I’m too worried about people thinking I’m Muslim or that I’m a half-muslim Christian! The reason is I’m so proud of my faith and I want to be a witness for Christ! I also don’t want people to misunderstand my reasons for covering. . I think I’ve forgotten to mention my other reason, when I explain the biblical and religion reasons: because I just want to!!

I’ve never been able to master the two-minute answer to “why do you wear that on your head?” especially to aetheists/random aussies who I don’t know well. What do you head covering ladies say? What is the “quick answer?” (it’s especially hard for non-muslim coverers!!)

Generally Christian reasons are as follows:
- Head covering in prayer
- Modesty (especially for married women)
- An outer sign of faith and modesty

Have I missed any? Do any of you ladies have any other reasons??

Of course there are times when I don’t want to, or I feel an urge to dress up sexy with my hair all done and looking great! And it is during these times especially that my religious reasons are important.

I’ll be honest (and a little boastful) - since I was a kid my aunties, and various people would tell me I have nice hair. At the moment its quite long too. Don’t get me wrong there are times when I have horrible hair and I think it’s hideous! But sometimes it looks great and I just wish I could show it off! And yet when women see my hair on the odd occasion and say “oh you have such pretty hair” I feel shy, rather than boastful, and feel more convicted to cover. hmmmm

Sometimes when I’m getting ready, say for a dinner, a wedding etc and I’m already and my head cover is the last thing to go on, I think, “Is this ridiculous?” or “what’s the big deal? It’s just hair, I should leave it off!” More often than not my face will look nicer with my hair out! Or I think, what is the purpose of dressing up, trying to look nice, if I’m covering my hair?

Lately I have relaxed a little- before I would always cover my hair around men. But there are some situations when I felt it was silly to cover.
Like when a family friend would drop by and I would walk into the room unaware. Or to answer the door to a man. Or go out to collect the mail and have a male neighbour strike up a conversation over the fence.
Rushing out of the room to grab a head covering or quickly pulling something over my head just doesn’t work. Where possible I will make sure I am covered, but in this situation worrying that a man had seen my hair seemed over the top. It’s not a sin (as far as I’m concerned) and acting as if he has just seen you starkers only makes the situation tense and uncomfortable! Not to mention many of these people have known me my whole life!

Likewise swimming at the beach with a head cover just didn’t work. I have lost countless bandanas that way. I wear shorts/tshirt and keep it as modest as possible – but I just had to accept that beach dress has to differ due to practicalities.
Also whenever I am in an awkward situation (eg trying to keep all covered up at the beach ) I feel I attract MORE attention. What would be accepted as normal and not given a second glance by friends or family suddenly becomes a big deal when I act as though seeing my hair or knees is like seeing me in a bikini. Do you know what I mean? It reminds me of the ultra-conservative nations like Saudi-arabia cause even hands/ankles to become sexualised.

I have been thinking I will probably become a little bit more steady in covering when I am married – I feel like then it gives more gravity to reasons of modesty, and people seem to understand the concept of modesty better when you are married.

just some thoughts.. what say you ladies (or gents!)

P.S As I was writing this I noticed a post on the Barei Lev blog talking about this very thing, titled "Looking Like a Muslim" - it's a great post with some equally great comments.. and I think is going to inspire me to be more bold in wearing WHAT I want WHERE I want!

I'll let you know how it goes!

Much love, Pamela

What is a head cover??

Hello loved ones,

Today I'd blog on head coverings... Once I decided on the why/when of covering, I had to address the "what" - namely, what should I wear?! (Here I turned to the internet covering-community!)
Head covering can range from amish-style bonnets, head wraps, lace doilies, veils, hijab-style wraps, hats, mantillas, bandanas and more!
As head covering is not related to any particular denomination for me I have experimented with different styles. Usually I do cover all or almost all of my hair, so I don't wear less covering styles. Sometimes I wear large bandanas which show more of my hair.
Otherwise I head head wraps (the easiest style), square scarves (esp. silk) tied under my chin in an italian/russian style or tied to the side like a more modern eastern european style. I sometimes wear beanies/berrets and long rectangle scarves in a range of styles, occiasonally in a hijabi style, or over my head with an end tossed loosely over my shoulder.

Also any sisters who are interested in modest fashionable dress here are a list of sites of some clothing websites and also (my favourite) some fashion blogs, the best of which is a blog called 'hijabstyle.'

Peace, mercy and grace be with you all

some great fashion sites:

http://hijabstyle.blogspot.com/ (This girl is a 19 yr/old Muslim medical student: who has been asked to write articles on modest fashion in The Guardian, as well as websites.. her outfits are AMAZING.. and easily adjustable)
http://hegab-rehab.blogspot.com/
http://www.polyvore.com/evening_wear_for_hijab/set?id=5864913
http://rodan657.ro.funpic.de/
http://silkreveries.blogspot.com/2007/05/classic-headscarf.html

Clothes & scarves online – use them to ‘shop’ for ideas as well as actual clothes!
http://www.justlongshirts.com/
http://www.losve.com/
http://www.missselfridge.com/
http://www.headcovers.com/scarves/head-scarves/
http://www.coveryourhair.com/
http://www.funkyfrum.com/
http://www.tznius.com/
http://www.shukr.co.uk/
http://thehijabshop.co.uk/
http://www.taakhi.co.uk/ - I love the ‘accessories’ section –amazing brooches/pins!

Pride, fashion and dancing the fine line

I actually wrote this post early January and then my computer froze up, crashed and I thought I had lost this post (after spending ages writing it!) Due to my forays into the blog "settings" I just realised it saved... so here it is, several months later!Happy New Years all! May God bless, guide and protest you all throughout 2009!Well I have been drifting in between extremes of lazyness and frantic bouts of activity since Christmas!My parents renovated our house this year, adding a bathroom, toilet, bedroom (mine!) and living room area.. it was sorely needed as our house is very small, and nowdays the "children" (myself, and 18 & 15 yr/old brothers) are no longer small! Cleaning, painting, tidying and a myriad of other small jobs have been slowly taking place, but now that the new year is underway and here downunder it is the long summer holidays, it's taking momentum!New Years Eve presented a challenge to me. Perhaps the biggest difficulty of my "change in lifestyle" has been to my social life. Actually it has been a slow period of change that got revved up a little by me headcovering this year.Around a year and a half a go I stopped drinking. I don't think I have ever been a heavy drinker, although teen partying and clubbing did sometimes see me a little worse for wear. Heavily tipsy seemed my limit as opposed to raving drunk. But nonethless this is NOT what God wants for our bodies. Having a lot of Muslim friends who are teetotal, they often asked me why it is alcohol is not forbidden in our religion, and why so many Christians drink. In our circle of friends, comprised of almost all religions and levels of religious observance there is an unspoken rule that we do not judge or condemn one another even if we disagree. Some people drink, some people smoke up the occaisonal joint, and some people are strictly against all of these things.But when I faced myself honestly, even if I only had ONE drink... what were my reasons? There were yummier (and cheaper) non-alcoholic drinks to be bought.. If I was honest I liked the feeling of being tipsy and also it was the social norm (Australians tend to be quite heavy drinkers.) I didn't decide to become teetotal per se.. I just didn't feel the need to have a drink when I went out and slowly stopped drinking at all. I don't feel, like Muslims do, that it is a sin to drink alcohol. I'll eat/drink something that has a small amount of alcohol in it, I just won't drink alcohol for the sake of drinking alcohol.Secondly I started clubbing a lot less (going to night clubs.) In the last year I have been maybe three times. Initially this was because myself and my best friend got tired of men trying to pick us up, buy us drinks (neither of us being drinkers), strangers coming up and dancing with us etc.. I always preferred going out with my male friends because then men kept their distance. One time after voicing my frustration to my bestie, ("I just want to have fun, I don't want to meet new people or make new friends! I'm not here to meet guys, can't they just go somewhere else!!") I realised that after all, what did I expect?! I was puttign myself in an environment where drinking, "picking up" and attracting the opposite sex was taken for granted. How could I expect people to realize I was an expection to that rule! I decided it wasn't worth the hassle and stopped clubbing so much. Luckily for me, several friends of mine are DJ's and there are always bbq's, house parties, beach parties with our large group of friends with dancing and fun.After I started covering things took on a new angle. My clothes had slowly changed over the last year or so. I am embarrassed to think of the things I used to wear a couple of years ago! Cleavage or low cut tops had long ceased to be an issue. But as I investigated the issue of covering, so too did modesty enter the scene. Changing my wardrobe has been much harder than putting a scarf over my head! I struggles with establishing what was "right."As Christians we come without a dress code (unlike Muslims who have defined strictures on headcovering and modesty; only the face and hands should be visible).So what is modesty?To me, it came to mean clothing which would not show off my body or be revealing. But even this isn't easy.. Long dresses and skirts (although they have become a more common part of my wardrobe especially with all those gorgeous maxi-dresses in season!) were not necessarily my interpretation of modesty.. long flowery dresses, or amish style bonnets were definately not my thing!!It was here that I stumbled across a problem I had in my life that I didn't even know existed!PRIDE. That word that comes before a fall, and is perhaps one of the biggest blind spots in our lives!Boy-o-boy was I unprepared for how much my pride was part of how I dressed."wow, this modesty thing is easy," was my first reaction. WRONG! Little did I know!I realised how I dress and look was ultimately governed by pride. Often when I dress myself to "look good" it is based on other people. Both men and women. To show myself off, and to send a message. "Look at me, I'm fashionable/successful/sexy/gorgeous." (Working in fashion retail didn't help!)I began to examine my motives in dressing. When I went out wearing something that showed off my figure and drew attention (from men or women).. I felt proud. Walking into the room, head held high, I was actually closing off my heart by surrounding in it pride. While clothes do not decide your attitude or change your behaviour I realised I tended to be a lot more "myself" when I dressed more modestly. The fact that giving up these sort of outfits was proving so hard was testament to the fact that I cared way too much about how I looked, and what other people thought of me.When I got back to Australia it was tough. The fact that many, if not most of my girlfriends are gorgeous and love fashion does not help. My two best friends also work in fashion and LOVE clothes. One (M) is a model and (Y) is pretty enough to be one. Y is a non-relgious Muslim, who supported my decision to cover and tried to help me find pretty and fashionable yet modest alternatives to wear when we went out. M thought I was crazy and pleaded with me not to cover my hair (It's your most beautiful feature, how can you cover it up?!) and not dress so modestly (Just wear the dress without the cardigan, it looks so much better. I don't understand why you have to dress like this now!) Satan whispered in my ear as I tried to dress, comparing my outfits to my friends, and taunting me that I would be "frumpy" from now on. No one would know how good I COULD look, if I dressed differently.At first in Germany, like many "converts" to a new lifestyle I was a little zealous. I didn't wear sleeves shorter than elbow length, or bottoms shorter than 3/4 length. After a while I relaxed and now wear short sleeves (although not sleeveless) and sometimes bottoms which are just below the knee, although usually not together. I also started spending way too much time thinking about what to wear.. These days I am somewhere in the middle. I am determined not to become a slave to modesty. All in all, I don't want my clothes to be the be all and end all. It is the dressing of my heart that is most important! I still enjoy fashion, coordinating outfits, looking nice.. so long as my look is more "pretty" than "sexy".. and my attitude is focused on my heart not my clothes.However clothing was also related to another problem: Modest dress had in turn led me to consider modest behaviour.
One quesion I am struggling with now is DANCING. This ties in with clubbing as well. I love dancing. I love music, especially Raggamuffin, dancehall, R&B, HipHop, Reggae as well as soul, jazz, latino, brazilian music, arabic, world, african (mostly swahili, rai and ethiopian) and even some electronic (like DJ Tiesto.) But for dancing purposes mostly the first four genres.. The beat of the music gets me every time.. I love dancing. And at the risk of sounding conceited.. I am good at it.
Here it gets tricky.. dancing gives me great joy, it is something I naturally love... but at the same time it can be risk for showing off. For anyone here who knows the ragga/rnb/hiphop scene.. you know how it goes.. the people who will dance in 'the circle,' the people who will get up and start dancing when everyone else is too shy, and get the whole room on their feet.. that is me.
The other tricky part is associated with modesty.. if Im careful not to wear tight clothes.. then I have to be careful about how I dance. Shaking and winding can all be.. hazardoud? At the moment my basic rules are:
I don't "grind" up against people when I'm dancing.. ill dance with guy friends in a non-sexual way
I don't dance to music in which the lyrics are rude or sexually explicit.. I just can't dance to a song where a woman is singing about "her goodies," (and half the girls are singing along.)
This is a hard one.. I'm not an athletic person, I was always shoddy at sports.. but dancing has always been 'my thing' and I love it! hmmmmm any thoughts?